It’s officially summer and I’m told that the commonfolk start bellyaching for something called a “vacation” during these warm months. I suppose it’s something of a break from the “work” they do to “earn” money and pay their “bills.” But what the hell, I decided to try out this vacation to see what all the fuss is…
Thank goodness BMW came to the rescue with an activewear line. It really was getting exhausting to have to hike, sweat and get dirt all over clothes that don’t showcase what kind of luxury sedan and/or crossover SUV I lease. Maybe the outdoors is fashionable again.
Automakers, for some reason, enjoy branching into “lifestyle” products, only to be met with intense ridicule for... decades. But they do it anyway, maybe to add a little spice to their lives other than choking out the word “dynamism” in every sentence. That’s (probably) why this world now has a Land Rover stroller.
When I think of an Aston Martin, I think of flowing lines, timeless elegance and the highest quality craftsmanship. Bespoke coachwork. Brogue interior detailing that would make you feel guilty for sitting in and dirtying up. And sneakers. I definitely think sneakers, too.
Everybody knows how much Ferrari loves to brand itself with things like shoes, backpacks, jackets, and yeah, even damn fanny packs. We’ve even had a lot fun making fun of Bugatti’s catalog of rich people shit. But what about us normies?
Oh, hello there. I just returned from the most wonderful trip up to the lake. Everyone was there. You should have come—but nooo you had to work so you can pay rent because you’re poor. I keep forgetting!
Bentley believes there are people out there who wish to go to London’s Harrods’ department store, only to spend $86 on the scent of the Bentley Bentayga. I’m confused.